Best Mother's Day Gift: A Monster's Love

When I picked Sam up from Susan's on Friday, he yelled as I came in the door, "Momma! I made you a present for Mother's Day!" He then handed me a decorated sack and said, "It's a coffee mug!" 

He was so excited about and couldn't wait to show it to me and tell me all about it. And he spent the next 20 minutes doing just that.

He colored me a monster. Isn't it beautiful? I may just drink out of this every day.

Especially after what happened later that night. I will warn you, this ends with me crying and I'll probably cry again while typing it. If you are prone to tears, just know it is coming.

I took Sam to Chick-fil-a Friday night because Justin went to eat with his yearbook staff and I thought a momma/son date sounded fun.

Of course, per usual, he wanted to play and not eat. When I finally got him to finish his food, he ran to the playground and started making the rounds on the playground. (Sidebar: Have you ever noticed how that place is just one intricate hamster wheel for kids?! Seriously...they just go round and round and round.) 

He had been playing for quite some time when an older woman and a mentally disabled woman came into the playground. The kids hardly took notice of this until the mentally disabled woman started screaming.

I was sitting on the benches keeping an eye on Sam when they came in and I witnessed her excitement to be around all of the kids. She couldn't contain her excitement, hence the screaming.

She just yelled, "HEEEEEEEY!" over and over again, but her voice was very loud and she was a big woman, so the kids took notice. And avoided her like the plague.

Now I may be one of the most outspoken and downright bitchy people you know when it comes to assholes and douche bags, but I can't stand the thought of someone feeling ostracized or hurt because of something they can't control. I'm not sure if she noticed the way the kids were reacting to her, but I certainly did and it was uncomfortable for everyone.

The kids did pretty well though and kept playing, they just remained cautious around her. But, when she reached out to say "hi" to Sam rather loudly and dramatically, things made a turn for the worst.

This was not okay to Sam. He ran to me and hid behind me. He said, "Momma, what's wrong with him?" 

I could tell this was going to be one of the experiences that I either botch like a moron or somehow come out victorious. But there was no way of knowing without engaging in the conversation and I had to be bold enough to actually talk about it instead of distracting him.

I pulled him in my lap and whispered in his ear, "Honey, she is just sick. She can't help it but it hurts her feelings when people say things where she can hear it so just go play, okay?"

It was about this time that she yelled, "BIIIIIIITCH!!!"

The whole room fell silent, the woman that brought her in shooshed her, and meanwhile Sam is still hiding behind me.


Through whispering... 

Sam: "Why did him scream that?"

Me: "I don't know Sam. It looks like she is excited and didn't know any better."

Sam: "Momma, he has scary eyes." 

Me: "I know honey. But she can't help that and it isn't nice to stare. Just go play, okay?" 

Sam: "Mommy, I want to go home."

I felt like that was probably best (and who isn't looking for an out to leave that dreadful playground?). We got outside and he continued to ask lots of questions.

"Why is he sick?"
-Baby, I don't know why. She was probably born that way. Or maybe had an accident and became that way. I don't really know. 

"Will he get better?"
-I don't know that either. I hope she does. 

"Why was his eyes scary?"
-Baby, I just don't know. It wasn't her fault though. 

"Why was him yelling like that?"
-Honey, she was just very excited to be around all of you kids having so much fun. She couldn't contain it and she expressed it by yelling. 

"Why did him say bad words?"
-That's a word she has heard somewhere and she doesn't realize she isn't supposed to say it there. 

"Mommy, is he a monster?"
-No, baby. She isn't a monster. I know it was scary and monsters are scary but she wasn't trying to hurt you. She was gentle, just excited. 

"Mommy, why did God make him like that?"
-Baby, I know you don't understand this, but I don't believe God made her sick. God wants all of us to be healthy and happy. We have no way of knowing why she is like that. 

"Mommy, when will God make him better?"
-I don't know sweetheart. But I hope he does. 

What happened next took the breath right out of me.

We had just pulled into the garage and Sam says, "Momma, can we ask God to make him better?"

I lost it. You see, you want so badly to raise your children to love others and to understand the need to love others. But at such a young age, it is hard to see if it is taking effect. And you can hardly expect them to get it at such a young age. Not to mention it is so much easier to avoid teachable moments because they are intimidating and the thought of messing it up and saying the wrong thing is overwhelming.

But, for my 3 year old to ask me to stop what we are doing and pray for that sweet woman... that is really something special. He is something special.

We prayed for the woman that she would get better and that people would accept her and that she would feel loved and accepted, no matter the circumstances. I then got out of the car and carried in my Mother's day mug.

When I got my mug at the beginning of the evening, I thought it was the most beautiful monster I had ever seen. In just a few short hours, I was proven wrong.

This is the best Mother's Day present I could ever get. I'm so proud of my son right now I could burst.