Race for the Cure Almost Made me Take a Dirt Nap

I'm posting from my phone and since Blogger does NOT appreciate my OCD, this post is likely to be an unorganized pile of goo with grammar and spelling mistakes galore. Enjoy.

The lady that watches Sam is a survivor of breast cancer. So when she asked me to be on her team, how could I say no?

I thought it would be SO MUCH FUN to include Sam. Lots of people, lots of fun, he gets to wear a race bib.... Great fun to be had!

Apparently I don't know my son at all. He took one look at all the people and went into, "STRANGER DANGER" mode complete with clawing at me like I was a safe harbor in the abyss of evil monkeys.

We were scheduled to walk the 5K. We weren't even to the starting line yet and he was already clinging to me like a missing sock to the inside of a fuzzy sweater straight out of the dryer.

When I suggested he walk or sit his forty pound ass in the stroller he looked at me terrified like I had just locked him in a room with an angry snake.

(Eye roll)

Fine. I'll hold you until you get acclimated.

Then of course he had to pee. Which means I had to take him into the row-o-porta-potties that I so much dread.

And just to my expectations, someone had a case of the sputter-butt right before we got in there and the colorful arrangement of ass-spatter mixed with the pleasant aroma of gas, urine, and mysterious blue chemical was almost too much to handle.

We got back and the race started and Sam was just as shy and frightened as ever. So I carried him.

For one whole painfully slow mile (60,000 people don't move awfully fast) I carried him.

On my chest, on my shoulders, on my hips.... Kid's feet didn't hit the street!

I weigh 125 currently. Sam is a chunky 40lber. I also have the muscle tone of slightly warm Jell-O. This situation is no bueno!

At about a mile in I finally popped my head out of my rear end and bribed him with iPhone time in the D A M N STROLLER!

He took it and I started getting blood flow back in my arms.

Thank you sweet baby Jesus!

The race was going so slow (bottle necking due to inefficient road blocks) that we had to finish the 2k instead of the 5k. Which was fine by me at this point bc I still hadn't gained back full use of my arms.

Highlight of the race: watching Susan go through the survivor finish and watching complete strangers cheer her on. That's what this race is about for me... A community supporting its survivors. Moving...

I'll leave you with several pics of the event... Enjoy and save second base!