Testimony Tuesday

God has been telling me for a little while that blogging could be a way to witness to others. Now I do not consider myself an "evangelical Christian," at least by the stereotype anyway, but I do like to live by example and spread my testimony when possible and will make an impact.

This is how "Testimony Tuesday" was born. Expect it every Tuesday. This will be a tool for me to keep on track with the many blessings God has given me and will be a good way to share to those unknown on the interwebs something that may be pertinent to them at the time.

Topic of today: Worry.

I have had ample opportunity to worry over this past year. Having a kid gives you that sort of access. And I have worried. I'd like to say that I haven't but truth hurts sometimes.

I have worried over fevers, and infected eyes, and breastfeeding, and formula, and daycare, and croup, and big ole heads, and specialist appointments, and milestones. Then I've worried about promotions and whether they would happen, buying houses and if we'd find the right one, and if my car would be dependable... There is always something.

As most of you know, my husband struggles with anxiety. He is an amazing man, and I honestly don't tell him that enough, and I am super proud of him. He has made great strides in his anxiety and to be honest, he has earned the right by human standards to worry (I'll leave it to him to share with you the ins and outs of his official "certificate to worry" he earned in his childhood).

But alas, we are both sinning by continuing to worry. Matthew 6:25-34 clearly states:

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[e]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I challenge you to read that again. And again. Looking back on all the things I have worried about, it was when I finally let them go and gave them completely to God that all of the sudden they worked out.

Sam's big ole head: I knew he was fine. But I allowed the enemy in and doubt began to fester. What if I am wrong? Why does he have to see a specialist? Blah blah blah. And then, one day I gave it to God. I told God that I knew he loved Sam more than I ever could, and since I knew how much I loved him, that I knew there was no way God was going to allow this mess to continue. And I thanked Him for that promise. And it was hard. But I did it. Two days later we were in the pediatrician's office being told he was normal and we no longer needed to see a specialist. Amen? I think so.

Buying a house is a pretty big deal. When we first starting looking, we found this house in a great neighborhood for a great price. But I worried. What if it had problems? Could we afford it? What work needed to be done? Could we afford it? Can my family live on ramen and hot dogs? We looked at this house on two different occasions and on both occasions I would lose sleep at night worrying about it. Neither of those times worked out. We started looking at houses again in January. I made a commitment to not worry about it. We found a house we loved in a neighborhood we loved for a price we loved. We were told it wouldn't work out. Buying directly from the seller never works. This won't work. That won't work. I never worried.

If you know me, you know spending money is a creative way to torture me. It makes me sick, literally. When we bought a car, I darn near threw up right there on the showroom floor. Spending money stresses me out. I have been cool, calm, and collected throughout this buying process.

Until I allowed myself to worry about the roof. And I had a hysterical breakdown, thought about not buying the house because of it... a whole bunch of garb for nothing. What was that? The devil getting his thorny little foot in the door. That's it. You know what? When I decided to not worry about it anymore, all things fell into place. Praise God? I believe so.

We did buy the house. We are working on the house now. It is a beautiful happy home that is going to be home for quite some time. And I love it. And I'm not nervous. I'm excited to go there. I'm excited to make it into exactly what we want. No fear. No worry. Praise God.

So my challenge to you is to release what you are worrying about to God. Right now. If you catch yourself worrying about something (because the enemy will bring pictures of it back to your brain), give it right back to God. It is foolish to continue to lose sleep and worry over even the smallest things all the way to the big things. Because God has already given us His promise that He will take care of us just as He takes care of the birds in the air.

If this is an area you struggle with, I have a small mini book I can email you that has a lot more information in it that is really remarkably helpful.