Angry Baptist Lady Called the Cops on Me and Flipped me the Bird!

I'm still laughing as I write this.

You are probably thinking, "Good grief, Rikki. What did you do to this sweet old lady?! Did you run her over in your car?! Did you kick her puppy?! What?!"

I merged.

That's it. I exercised my right to remain on the road when a lane ends.

Now you are probably thinking, "Well Rikki, did you merge like an asshole?"

Valid question.

Answer: No, no I didn't.

I was driving on the access road from Bryant to Little Rock. I was in the left lane and angry Baptist lady (ABL) was in the right hand lane. The lane is about to end so I looked behind me to see if anyone was near me and I see ABL at least two car lengths behind me. I turned my blinker on as I continued to look behind me, just in case.

She sees my blinker then gasses it.

*giggle* Oh no. Not happening.

So I went on and got over.

Should I have let her pass me on the right hand side when I mid-way through a merge?

Possibly.

But that would have resulted in me sitting on the side of the road waiting on ABL to pass me. That seems absurd.

What transpired after this is only meant for SNL skits...

This lady, who couldn't have been a minute under 60 years old, flips me off like it is her JOB!

Waving it at me... mean scowl on her face.... she is giving me the SUPER FINGER!


 Seriously. This is happening.

And I can't hold my laughter! It was one of the most ridiculous sights I have ever witnessed. She was so angry!

Dear ABL,

I'm sorry I utilized my right to remain on the road and gave you ample notice to see this was happening. I sincerely hope you weren't late to your appointment to get the stick surgically removed from your ass.

Sincerely,

Momma w/ a Dude Name

Apparently seeing me laugh about the situation didn't set well with her. I wish I could have held it in for her sake, but it was too darned funny.

Clearly my laughter equated the response of me setting her on fire... because then she angrily lunged at her phone so she could take pictures of my license plate! I have no doubts she then called the police to turn me in.

Dang law abiding citizens... merging and junk... we are a menace to society!

I feel like I'm forgetting something... let's see...

Oh yeah! How did I know she was Baptist?!

Because when she raced around me at her earliest convenience, she was sporting a sticker from her church on her bumper! :-)

Way to represent, ABL. Way to represent.

As someone so eloquently put it this morning, way to let your light shine!