Being a Real Mom in a Fake World: ACPA Reflection

While at ACPA in Vegas, I attended a program about how supervision is a lot like parenting a toddler.

I almost didn't go to the session because my thought process was, "well duh! Of course it is!"

And I could list all the ways I see parallels here and even some of the new ones I picked up in the session, but that wasn't the biggest take away I had from that program.

What I thought the presenter did best was present the "real" side of being a mom and the "real" side of supervising.

I get criticized a lot for being too real. I say it like it is. I cuss. I'm not phenomenal at "keeping up appearances."

And here is why: it is exhausting.

Living is hard enough without having to try and keep up with the Joneses.

You know what?

Sometimes your kid is an asshole. Sometimes your employees are assholes.

Sometimes I react poorly to my kid's needs.
Sometimes I react poorly to my employees' needs.

Sometimes being a mom sucks!
Sometimes being a supervisor sucks!

And yet the overall message is the same:

My son is my reason for life and I can't imagine life without him.
My job is my passion in life and I can't imagine life without it.

Why do we have this compulsion to make sure everyone knows how awesome and put together we are? Do people really learn from that?

I get more positive feedback because I'm "real" than I ever have gotten for being seemingly "well put together."

No one wants to surround themselves with jackasses who never make mistakes.

BORING!

And what is there to learn with that?

Nothing.

So my charge here is to drop the act. Be real. Share with your staff the fact that your son acted like he got into the bath salts last night and you are a bit on edge. Share the good, the bad, and the ugly about supervision with your mentees. How else will they know?

Life is beautiful if you just allow yourself to live it. Share the actual experience with others. Not what you think the experience should be.

*note: this blog was written on a phone. The author is aware of your and you're and their proper uses. She is also an exceptional speller in real life. Her sausage like fingers and love/hate relationship with autocorrect proves problematic in social media from time to time.